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My best nineties diva pose, channeling TLC

My best nineties diva pose, channeling TLC

I was born in the second last month of ‘the eighties’ (hint hint- my birthday coming up!).

My childhood clothes in the nineties consisted of Mini Minors, Osh Kosh B’gosh and hand-me-downs- usually from children my age (I was a small child!) and occasionally my brother and I would model these clothes at fashion parades (why Mum, whyyyy).

Yesterday on a lazy Sunday we went out to one of Libby’s sites she works for, half an hour out of the city to give out free petrol vouchers! I came with her for moral support and the bribe of a salad roll (her shout). Lib pointed out that I looked like I stepped out of the nineties- dirty driving glasses from Lib’s glovebox, Cue Australia vintage neon top, kmart leggings with holes in the bum, jelly sandals and lovely hairy legs. It was like I was six years old again, complete with food on my pants!

It was a great photographic moment waiting for customers in the sun!

Jelly Bean sandals

Jelly Bean sandals

 

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It was hot and lovely and we were watching ’25 biggest divas on the screens outside’. ‘Caught out there’ by Kelis came on and I am kicking myself so much for not listening to it more when I was massively down about being dumped. Gosh! What a kickass song.

🙂 Just wanted to recap my sunday because it was lovely.

 

 

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Woho

So WoHo happened last Friday night, and it was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!

Twelve women gathered together to share lollies, sushi and creative times, each creating a page (or two!) to add to the collaborative Women in Hobart Zine.

Photo by Jaclyn Rogerson

Photos by Jaclyn Rogerson

I really did feel a sense of community, purpose and connection in the room. And the venue!! The Craft Hive is the most beautiful place, so safe and cosy! And central!

I can’t wait to put it all together and mail it out to the participants with some extra goodies!

In the meantime I’ll be adding more photos as they are received.

The Craft Hive!

Lovely ladies gettin' creative!A big THANK YOU to my lovely friend Ruby for helping and hosting and generally being awesome at facilitating the workshop! I’m feeling inspired all over again from thinking about the fantastic pages everyone created.

In happiness

Laura

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This will be my one and only break-up post about Damon and I.

It’s close to two months since he broke up with me. When I was in Europe I did some dumb things and cheated on him. Stuff I apologised for the next day but stuff that obviously hurt him.

I had gone away thinking I was the luckiest girl in the world. I spent five weeks pining, and was almost jumping out of my skin for the whole two days travel back home. I literally ran across the tarmac to see him.

The next week was an uncomfortable one, something had changed.  He acted like a completely different person around me to what I had left. After I found out he had feelings for someone else, he told me he hadn’t wanted to see me or spend time with me when I got back. I felt like, and I still feel like, he broke up with me for someone else.. this has only been compounded by the fact that he met her while I was away, and has been seeing her since we broke up.

To put it lightly- I was/am devastated. I thought we had the best relationship I could ever even hope for, he was my best friend, confidante, lover and partner in crime.

I cried so much over the next few days that my lips were bleeding from dehydration.

BUT you know what? Things are going to be okay.

Because I finally understand what it means to feel happy being single, what it feels like to feel happy about who you are, and that I’m capable of good, passionate things.

I had to learn (quickly) to put everything into perspective.

Two weeks after I was broken up with, I got a call from my mum saying my grandpa had had an aneurism. It was the day of the One Billion Rising dance at MONA, and I was feeling so empowered and liberated that I was going to dance in revolt to past violent experiences. I danced and I danced for everyone I have ever known to experience sexual assault. I felt empowered and I felt great.

I rang mum in a mixture of happiness and apprehension. She said I should come to Melbourne as I might not get to see Grandpa again and it was more serious than she first told me. I boarded a plane that night. I wasn’t sure how conscious he was going to be when I got there and I was so angry and so full of regret for not spending more time with Grandpa. He had always been so kind, humble and loving.

The plane trip went quickly but painfully. After doing a Heathrow-Abu Dhabi-Melboure-Hobart trip two weeks before I was well and truly over travelling. And planes. And flight attendants. I cried and cried because it reminded me about how happy I had been just two weeks before when I thought I was coming back to my old life where I felt safe and loved.

My parents met me at the airport in Melbourne, they had previously spent almost three months in Brisbane before heading down to Melbourne to see Grandpa. Grandpa’s girlfriend/companion of over ten years Mavis had died a few weeks earlier and he had stopped eating. He was ready to die. It broke my heart when I went to the hospital and he was in a deep sleep, his feet twitching and his breath heavy. His body was wasting away. He was clammy and his skin looked papery. I was in a bit of shock I think as it took me ages to unwind.

I slept in Grandpa’s bed that night. The sheets had been changed but his room had his musty old man smell still. Although he had a two bedroom unit, he slept in the smaller bedroom, in a single bed, without any windows and just a skylight for light. All over the walls were pictures of his (our) enormous family- he loved us all so much. There were pictures of him and Grandma on their wedding day, photos of Grandpa from the war, photos of my dad and his siblings looking cheeky from fifty years ago, pictures of my cousins and I when we were children, and pictures of his great grandchildren. He was probably lonely, but every night I’m sure he was comforted by the photographs of people he loved and who loved him too.

Life was suddenly put into perspective when I crawled into his bed that night. Mum burst into my room at five in the morning. Grandpa had taken a turn for the worst.

At first I wasn’t even sure if I was going to go to the hospital as I was exhausted. But I’m so glad I did because Grandpa was conscious and registered we were there. I stood over the bed in my white fluffy eyelash jumper and probably looked like an angel to him, but at least I got to say hello-his eyes flashed recognition.

Half an hour later his breathing stopped and my dad’s eyes filled. Something had changed in the room, and he was gone.

I went home the next day back to Hobart. Between then and the day of the funeral is a blur. I wasn’t able to attend the funeral but my sister read out a poem she had written about Grandpa for Grandparent’s Day at school, year six. The same poem he had kept on his wall in his bedroom for over ten years. I heard the funeral was beautiful, but I had said goodbye in that hospital room.

Since Grandpa’s passing I’ve been trying to make the most of every day and little things.
I’m having lovely hot baths with epsom salts, I’m dancing around my room naked, I’ve taken up surfing, I’ve (attempted) knitting, I’ve been getting passionate about causes that matter.

Yesterday I went and got my last script for anti-depressants. My doctor told me it was almost two years to the day I was first prescribed medication. While I’m still grieving my loss of my relationship, every day is getting easier and easier and I’m enjoying being single for the first time. I feel ready to go off medication because I’ve slowly come to realise that my life is worthy of living. Grandpa died at age 92 with four children, fourteen grandchildren and two great-grandchildren. Love is infinite, and I intend on living for at least another seventy years so I’m opening my heart up again to loving and receiving love.

And I was lucky enough to inherit something beautiful and sentimental from Grandpa; the glass bowl he would keep full of Sherbet Bombs to offer guests. There is nothing greater to remind me of Grandpa’s humility, love and kindness. 🙂

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Lib and I on our birthday weekend, in front of a water taxi which took us to the pub!

Things that have been hip-hop-happening lately;

1. BettyMag is finally at the printers! So proud/happy/excited/relieved. It should be finished printing by Wednesday, the day I fly out. I’m hoping to secure all stockists for my sister to distribute whilst I’m away. Very exciting!

I’ve decided to go seasonal with the magazine so launching issue 1 as a Summer issue. There are some awesome contributions by local women in it- I can’t wait to see people’s responses.

Screen Shot 2012-11-27 at 9.52.12 AMThe front cover!

2. EUROPE on Wednesday. Soooo nervous!! I am really worried about getting homesick and culture shock.

Lib bought me the Lonely Planet guide to London and I’ve been flipping through it getting more and more excited as well as overwhelmed! How am I supposed to fit it all in?? Insane.

It was 36 degrees here today so I’m kind of looking forward to the cold again, it’s what I’m used to.

I’ve got some new tightology tights, ‘art teacher’ red walking shoes and my suitcase waiting to be packed.

I cannot wait to see Victoria (otherwise known as Feeley)- my best friend from high school ❤ ❤ eeeh!! I’ll be staying at her house in London!

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                                                           Feeley and I, circa 2007

3. Moving house!  I have been frantically packing up all my crap and storing it at Damon’s. It’s been giving me the worst hayfever from all the dust.

I decided it was time to move out of Kelly Street, as much as I have loved my time there (although there have been definite ups and downs). I’ve spent a good four years there, my first home away from home. Time to move on to bigger, brighter and space-yer things.
I’m moving in with Nao, Alex and Mahain which should be a good balance. We’ve applied for a house in the CBD with floorboards and a chandelier, gosh I hope we get it! Whilst the real estate agent has called us to say we have their approval we have to wait for the owners to give it the AOK.

I cannot wait to get back from my travels and get into a groove at a new place. For my birthday, Damon printed out a huge 4 x A4 by 4 x A4 photograph of us for me to put above my bed. I will definitely put up pictures once it’s in place!

Speaking of the wonderful Damon, he found out today he got First Class honours ! And I can officially graduate because I passed cognitive neuroscience and psychological assessment units!

Happy days.

Laura

Tick Tock.

In less than three weeks now I will be leaving bound for Melbourne-Kuala Lumpur- then landing in London.

Feelings of excitement aside, I’m actually pretty f*cking scared.

Yes, I did just turn 23 last week (woo!) but I haven’t been overseas since I was 15, and even then I was with a school group, with every hour accounted for by a carefully formulated itinerary and an overzealous French teacher.

What if I miss the plane? How will I find my way around the airport? What if I lose my passport?

What if I get mugged? What if I run out of money? What if I just can’t cope?
So many ‘what if’ scenarios have been playing in my head recently; with basic premise being how will I cope if things don’t go smoothly?

This will be a massive test for me to prove to myself that I can do this.

I hope I surprise myself and just go with the adventure.

A recent DIY

Family connections to England

My dad has always told me that his fathers family were from Yorkshire, and after looking around the internet apparently Kays were first recorded in Yorkshire around 1219.

When my dad travelled to England to finish his studies, he was driving through this area of Yorkshire when he started having out of body experiences and shaking. It was later when he realised he had been passing a cemetery full of Kays. SPOOKY SHIT.

My grandpa is in this photo. He flew in a Lancaster called Betty during World War 2.

The story of how my grandparents met

My grandmother Betty Kay (nee Brampton) was from Birmingham. She was pretty poor, and came from generations of housekeepers re: maids.

My grandpa, Charles (still alive, bright and sharp at 92 years) was on post in England when he went to a local dance with some of his fellow soldiers. He said that a few young girls came up to them and they shooed them off because they were annoying. However, later in the night Grandpa met up with Betty and they obviously had a great time- they married in England before returning to Australia after the war to have my father and his siblings.

I hope I can visit both Yorkshire and Birmingham areas when I’m there.

My grandmother Betty died when I was a child, but I like to think of her as feisty and fiery, a bit like my aunt (my fathers sister). I like to think she had guts. She must have to be just a  teenager and to go up to a group of soldiers to try and get them to dance with her.

It’s my grandma I dedicate Betty magazine to.

xo Laura

Mary treated us so much for our birthdays!

Friday was Libby’s birthday night.

Mary decorated the house with balloons and happy birthday signs- very festive!

We went next door for drinks before out to dinner at the lovely Ciuccio in Salamanca Square for pasta and pizza.

It was such a great night!

xx

Study mode, showing off sparkly nails

November is going to be another busy month!

Libby’s, Damon’s and my birthday all fall in the next few weeks which makes it very fun filled.

A few life changing things are going to also happen this November.

I’m going to finally publish Betty and finish off the last exam for my Bachelor of Arts degree, with double majors in Psychology and Sociology (although I’ll be in europe over graduation). Exciting !

Here is a list of my plans:

  1. Finish off my undergraduate degree! – my last exam is on Monday. Bring it.
  2. Publish Betty finally! – this is something I’ve been wanting to do for soooo long but my health, uni and life has always gotten in the way. Not this month!
  3. Save like crazy for London town – working, babysitting, selling stuff. I need to make this happen.
  4. Wear nail polish everyday. – just ‘cos.
  5. Keep downsizing my belongings, through markets and giving – less junk, less clutter. There are so many things that I have that I don’t need.
  6. Do radio training so I can be confident on the buttons – really looking forward to this one! I need to give Holly a break (although she does such a good job)- i’ve been evading learning the buttons for awhile now.. time to step up!
  7. Make Damon his birthday present – already bought one part of his present today, now just have to ‘make’ it. I’ve been inspired by a fellow blogger, you’ll see it soon 🙂
  8. Celebrate turning 23 with the lovely Lib! – gah! Our birthdays are neighbours 🙂
  9. Walk in the Christmas pageant supporting Amnesty International – again, really looking forward to this one. I’ll post more about it when I know what’s involved.
  10. See my little sister! – She’s flying down from Brisbane around the middle of the month. She’s got glandular fever at the moment so I plan on giving her some TLC when she gets here.

What are your November plans? Anything exciting?

Laura